New STD in a Committed Relationship – Is he Cheating on You?

You just got an STD – Has he been cheating on you?

So you’ve been in a relationship with your man for a while, and suddenly you start to get symptoms of a sexually transmitted disease (STD).  You get a test, and it’s confirmed – you have an STD. You haven’t slept with anyone but your man for months.  Does this mean your man is cheating on you?  Not necessarily. Here are some things to think about before you accuse your man of cheating on you:

  1. STD’s can be Asymptomatic

Just because you are suddenly showing symptoms of an STD, it doesn’t mean that you just contracted it.  Many STD’s including chlamydia, herpes and syphilis can show no symptoms for many months after contracting the disease.  Some people will never see a symptom, but they can carry the disease for years.  This is why it is important to get tested for all STD’s once or twice every year.


  1. You Don’t Have to Have Sex to get an STD

You don’t necessarily have to have sex in order to get a sexually transmitted disease.  Sounds a bit odd, but it’s true.  Do you ever get your bikini line waxed?  If the place you went to doesn’t use a new smear stick for each application of wax, STD’s can breed in the large wax container.  If the person getting waxed before you had an STD, you could potentially get it next.  Ever shared a shower scrub with another female?  Some STD’s can be passed on that way as well.


  1. Getting Tested

If you and your man decided to throw away the condoms without getting tested – either one of you may have brought the STD with you into the relationship.  Before the condoms are tossed out the window, both you and partner should have a full STD test.  Get tested for everything – Gonorrhea, Chlamydia, Syphilis, HIV, Hepatitis, Herpes.  If you’ve never been tested before, it’s even more reason to do so now.


  1. Talk to Your Man

While everything above is true, you can’t automatically rule out that he isn’t cheating you.    He needs to get tested as well.  He may be lucky and not even have the disease yet.  If he does have it, and it’s likely he does as he was having sex with you, the important thing is that you both get treated promptly.  Suggest getting regular tests together just in case.  If he is sleeping around, this could be a good deterrent as well.